cheers to first kisses

Please click on the link for "last entry" to view my actual entry which I wrote last night, but for reasons I don't understand it was not posted. Any of you who might have for some reason tried to read my journal last night would not have found this entry.

Anyway, tonight is Tuesday night, and I've just gotten off the phone with my friend Joshua who is in the Air Force down in Coccoa Beach, FL. I don't see him anymore since we graduated two years ago, but he's a keeper. I would like to meet a guy like him in my proximity.

Jon didn't call; there's the update.

Tonight is the anniversary of my first kiss. It also happens to be my fathers fifty-third birthday today. I'm twenty-four, and I've only been kissing for six years -- today -- and I've only kissed eight guys. That doesn't count lame, drunk fucks who were instantly pushed away, and it doesn't count Jon-the-kisser.

#1: Bobby the Strange from New Hampshire (most of you know the story and have seen the place), lasted four weeks, six years ago.

#2: David the Terrorist (I was only nineteen), lasted two years, three years, two months ago.

#3: Jesse from England (not actually from England, but I met him there: cool story, dip-shit guy), lasted five days, three years ago.

#4: Amrin the Surfer (If you can't kiss your friends, who can you kiss?), lasted four months, two years, six months ago.

#5: Bobby the Drummer (my roommate's boyfriend's roommate and we were on strict instructions not to hook up so we did), lasted a night, two years, ten months ago.

#6: Eric from Ohio (vini, vidi, vici), lasted seven days, two years, four months ago.

#7: Alan the Guatemalan (everyone needs to kiss at least one Latin person, but it sucks that he lies about remembering it), lasted one night, one year, three months ago.

#8: Josh the Hippie (he felt like claiming the unatainable, then stopped talking to me), lasted one night, six months ago.

For those of you who know me, you should agree that I deserve a hell of a lot more kissing than this record shows proof for.

I've got that pinch in my chest that tells me I'm worried that I can't accomplish all the things I'm supposed to in the allowed time. Tomorrow will be busy, and it's late, but if feels good to have ended the day with a long conversation with an old friend who knows me well.

Here's a toast to lasting love, passionate kisses, sober promises, and shared secrets.

May the best of my past be the worst of my future.

Cheers.